BK2010 was my second half marathon ever. So naturally, I just remember BK2010 being awfully painful. I also remember chatty threesome near me that talked the entire length of Ocean Avenue. I was dying and they were talking about best Pizza in Brooklyn. But most of all, I remember feeling really lonely out there, as two people that promised to run it with me had to back out – Xena for injury, and Cesar for work.
But what a difference 2 years makes! New Course! New Capacity! New Team! Buncha people I know! The only thing that remained the same was that upon arriving to start area, I had to go poop like no other.
Anyways, we all did our pre-race rituals. I saw Jeff going in strange circles warming up. I saw Lisa doing calf raises. I don’t know where Tom disappeared to, but I’m sure he had some secret moves. I did my rituals too; one of which involves the only two yoga moves I know. Myth Coach "Tack Work" Terry says Cobras with a Twist & Downward Dogs are good stitch preventers.
I have a lot of pre-race rituals, I know… But I always say, “You’re not a real runner until you’ve developed at least half a dozen pre-race rituals/superstitions!”
Now, did anyone else feel extreme pain before the start horn??? I did!!!! I don’t know but I think there were some form of singing that made me want to channel my inner Simon Cowell! If the 17,000 people gathering hadn’t woken up the neighbors, that definitely got them up! They probably woke up to their ears bleeding mysteriously!
I think it’s safe to say that all Agonites were rather concerned about the 17,000, but once we got going the crowd broke apart pretty quickly. My shins felt fine for a change. Those rituals paid off! I’m using a super secret technique to keep my strides at a good width and cadence. Down the hill then up the Flatbush Avenue Hill. I’ve done this hill once with my training partner in the winter, so I’m not scared by the distance. Just kept on chugging along!
Over the “big hill” in Prospect Park, the unthinkable happens: A WEDGEY. WTF. Now my shorts are “unbelievably-too-short-for-thunder-thighs” CWX shorts. There is no room for me to stick my hand in to correct this sucker. I have to fix this ASAP or I'm going to end up with chaffed lady-parts! My pace is pretty good so I don’t want to stop to fix this. Besides, I'm surrounded by DUDES. How emabarrasing it would be to stick my hand in my shorts! So I pull my shorts around, wiggle my butt, run a little funny, and decide my “lucky panties” needs to be retired. While I’m wiggly-running, I see Coach Terry stealthily observing. Sigh. This is the first time he’s seen me in a race and this is what he sees… Finally towards the Park exit, I manage to get my panties fixed.
As we approach the exit of Prospect Park, I see a bunch of runners in purple coming in. This is a chance to rake in good Karma; so I shout, “GO TEAM!!” and cheer them on as I leave the Park. My eyes meet with one and she says “Thank you!!” Cha-ching! Cha-ching! I feel my karma meter go up - my panties stay put for the rest of the race.
Ocean Avenue is unremarkable, but it’s deceptively tough because it’s either flat or slight uphill. You don’t really get a break the whole time. Looking for entertainment, I see a guy in a long sleeve white shirt with a funny hair patch on his head. I mean, it’s all shaved except for a small patch on back of his head. Is he a Hare Krishna? Do they run in half marathons? I’m enamored and just keep on following him. But this lands me in trouble. I neglected to pay attention to mile markers! Is it mile 9, where I was supposed to take gel? Or is it mile 10? You see, my Garmin is set to no distance display for races as it pisses me off when it says mile 5 and it’s really mile 4.5. I see the next mile marker coming up, and it says….11. oops. I hurry up and take my “doping gel” (100mg Caffeine) but I think it’s too late. These gels take longer to kick in compared to my liquid EFS gels.
So I’m feeling a bit drained when a chicky-poo in Reservoir Dog singlet passes me. She’s in a skort. I decide for myself that since I’m in a team now I must pass other teams. For the next mile I play chase with her. But right after the BQE overpass, the Bow-Wow Skort starts walking – so much for competition.
On Surf Avenue, I encounter the token Front Runner Queen! A race is never complete with a mini-race with one! Oh, but this one’s a heavy breather. Yikes. I pass him fast. As I approach 800m mark, another Skort passes me. This one looks about my age, but half my size!! Must.Pass.Skort. She’s a quick one! I lose to her going up the ramp. But at 200m to go, I sprint through like I do in track class's "straight aways". I pass her skinny skorted-ass.
After we all finish, I get to meet up with my fellow Agonites for a chat and photos. I make a new discovery: Marco-Polo is f-ing TALL. The last two times I’ve seen him, he was sitting down or I was sitting down, so I couldn’t tell. It’s the first time I’ve stood side by side to him. I thought he was a short little Italian guy for some reason, so at first I didn’t know who he was. LOL
Congratulations to PRs and good race, everyone! It was a lot of fun. I wasn’t lonely this time!
